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Friday, October 14, 2011

I'm fat, your not-- and? WAY WAY off topic

This is my opinion. You can read it, and you can give YOUR opinion but you don't get to tell me I'm wrong, or I'm stupid, or what I have written has no merit.

Consider yourself warned.

A few months back I read a post from a lovely Caidian woman who was a bit irritated by the whole fat girl empowerment movement. Her complaint was larger women putting ultra thin females down, using phrases such as "real women have curves" etc etc. I empathized and gave a personal experience of when I realized that a thin person had just as many body issues as I have. It was the moment in my life when I realized that there are very very few people in this world who are happy with their bodies, weight aside.
Yesterday I read a blog on the same topic, and two different notes/posts  -- all from different people (both genders) angry by the Fat girl empowerment movement.

This whole thing has been kicking around in my head for a bit, and I felt like I wanted to add my two cents to it.
-- BTW this is not me saying your opinion doesn't have merit, or I don't empathize with you, if you are the ultra thin woman. This is MY feelings about it. Oh and this is not a campaign for "being overweight is fine, and there are no health risks". Thats crap, being overweight is NOT healthy--

First, deal with it. Yup, that's about as harsh as I can be but its the truth.

For YEARS overweight people have been told to deal with being large, or lose weight.
We've been told thru society/media/school/family repeatedly we have no social value, even less self worth, have been teased, ridiculed, bullied, put down, mocked, hurt and have done worse to ourselves BY ourselves.

Do you know on average, 67% (according to a google search mind you) of men age ranges 22-35 will not ask a woman out if she is moderately overweight? Moderately overweight being anything bigger than a size 10?

You think being overweight is not an issue? Ask the two girls on "America's next top model" who were considered overweight and "plus sized" at size 8 and size 10. Yeah  cause that's fair.

But suddenly there has been this movement of empowerment of overweight women. Skinny girls are crying about being picked on!
You've never been teased so horribley you cry in the bathroom, AS AN ADULT.
You don't know the agony of having to get yet a bigger size pair of pants because these don't fit anymore and you're not quite sure what your going to do.
OH and I highly doubt you've ever been standing in a group of big girls and got IGNORED by all the attractive men in the room because you're thin.
You don't watch commercial after commercial about weight loss, diet, being thin and healthy, and don't get more depressed by the hour.
You don't think about all of the failed diets and weight loss plans you've followed to the letter only to have it come crashing back as soon as you are no longer following said plan.
I doubt you know the agony of worrying whether or not you'll fit in the seat on the airplane or the ride at the amusement park. You have never worried about the seat belt in a friends car extending far enough, and you don't automatically ask for a table at a restaurant because a booth might present issues.

Also, look me straight in the eye and tell me you have never made fun of a fat person.
You can't do it. Hell FAT people can't do it. We make fun of ourselves so it doesn't hurt as bad when you do it. Watch a stand up of any comedian who is overweight. If they can make it thru the entire thing without mentioning their size, I'll give you a dollar.
Hell I might give you two.
You aren't your childs "fat mom"
you aren't the fat sister, mother, aunt, daughter.
You don't get described as having a "great personality".

But now, you want to whine and cry because fat girls are suddenly standing up for themselves? And you don't like it? It hurts your feelings?
I've dealt with your snotty, rude, ignorant attitude my entire freaking life. I've been chubby since before I knew what chubby was. I have been spit on because I was overweight. Did I deserve that? Absolutely not.

Is it time for people world wide to be more conscience about their weight and health? Of course it is. Is it time for us to stop looking at all people with some extra weight and automatically assume they are a health issue?
At my heaviest EVER, when I weighed over 450 lbs, I had absolutely no health issues other than being fat.
I did not have high cholesterol, high blood pressure, I was not diabetic, I was not hypo/hypoglycemic, I could still walk, I could still get dressed, I could still jog though not very far.
Oh and yes I could touch my toes.
I was overweight. My BMI was 64.
I was still healthy, enough so that even my surgeon said he's NEVER seen anyone weigh as much as I did and still be as active as I was.

At my lowest post op weight I got down to 237. Then I flip flopped back and forth and am now struggling again with post pregnancy weight.

But you want me to be sad because you, skinny girl, feel picked on because suddenly large girls everywhere are waking up and realizing that someone somewhere will in fact love them, they have worth, they are not useless and they are just as beautiful?

Not gonna happen.

I think people need to stop using weight as a means of value. Stop using the number on the scale, or the size of pants as a basis for self worth.

You should be size healthy.


  1. I love you more than words can say!!! And I adore everything you've said...and agree 450%!!!

    Much <3 to my Fia =)

  2. Love, love, love.

    Been overweight since I was about 10 years old. The worst mistake I have ever made was going on a diet to try to keep my boyfriend happy (while on meds that slow the metabolism and MAKE you fat, tyvm). The crash diet was unhealthy, and while yes, I lost 60 lbs, I gained it all back and it all destroyed me even more, mentally and emotionally.

    I'm back on the wagon again, but this time for me and the sake of my own health. Not too look good, not to make my man happy, not even for fashion, clothes, or any of the other benefits that will come from losing weight. I'm doing it because I'm at a high risk for diabetes based on family medical history, so that combined with my Graves' Disease, would devastate me.

    Skinny bitches, get over it. The media has warped your minds just as much as everyone else. We have to live on, so do you.

  3. Amen my Sistah Fia! I could not possibly agree more! If me being proud of who I am is seriously that intimidating or threatening to someone else then they need to figure out why they are so insecure, because that is THEIR problem, not MINE!